Birthday Number One

Sometimes the biggest joys come from the littlest things.

Last week, Braeden was at soccer camp. This camp has a Wacky Wednesday where the players dress up, and they get to dress the coaches as well. I probably should have gone to see the coach that was wearing my plus-size dress!

One of the items Braeden brought down to dress in was a little purple wizard hat. I’m not really sure how it landed in the costume box, but it was actually from a dog Halloween outfit. It was worn by the late Typhoon, back when Braeden was four. We called him “The Great Whizzer.” He wasn’t amused, but we humans were.
Braeden decided it was really too small to be comfortable – though he was correct that it was funny looking on him. Since Braeden can never be bothered to put anything fully away, the hat landed on the floor in the foyer at some point.

There the hat was discovered by Thane. He deemed it a party hat. Right size, makes sense. Thaney was just thrilled with his find and put it right on.

All of this has lead to discussions of birthdays. Misty has a birthday next week. She’ll be twelve. Yikes! She’s our we’re never going to have a baby, let’s get another puppy (we had three other dogs when we got her). Thane took great glee in planning and will go shopping with one of us for party goods. We’re going to throw a party for her complete with yellow cake (so I ordered 5 different kinds of gluten free cake from The Gluten Free Mall last night) as I need to make cupcakes to freeze for school anyway. He’s undecided at the moment as to whether Mist’s cake should be a square or a dog bone shape.


Trying on the party hat.


Happy as can be!


Cheese!


Can I make a silly face?


Trying unsuccessfully to make a sad face.


Could he look any happier?

He’s still one, and he will only be “the number one” on his next birthday too. We asked him who he’d invite to a birthday party.

“I like Mama!”
“I like Daddy!”
“I like Braeden!”
“I like Misty!”

He started walking away from us, Dave and I, adding, “And I like the Wiggles!”


That sure made us laugh! It was so simple, so honest, and totally cute!

Four or One

I love having a 10-year-old – he’s outside playing with his brother and I get to stay with the air-conditioning!

I overheard a friend of Braeden’s say that Thane is really weird. It irritated me at the time, but I think part of it may have been that Thane kept calling him by the name of a different friend of Braeden’s, one who is here much more often, and it happens to be the name of the other boy’s little brother. So it was probably annoying him to be called by his brother’s name!

Anyway, some of the issues boil down to Thane being four. Most of what he was doing is pretty typical for a 4-year-old. A couple of online friends pointed out that I could have probably just explained it as “Thane’s four. He’s just being four.” That actually brings up one interesting thing about Thane. I find it charming, but people don’t get it. He says he is “One, just one” and he will often point to himself to indicate the fact that he is indeed just one boy. But he is four years old . . . and that means absolutely nothing to him. When you think about it, years don’t mean much to kids and when they say how old they are they are just following a script. Thane doesn’t want this particular script, so for now he’ll be one, until he decides he is more than one.
I love having a 10-year-old – he’s outside playing with his brother and I get to stay with the air-conditioning!

I overheard a friend of Braeden’s say that Thane is really weird. It irritated me at the time, but I think part of it may have been that Thane kept calling him by the name of a different friend of Braeden’s, one who is here much more often, and it happens to be the name of the other boy’s little brother. So it was probably annoying him to be called by his brother’s name!

Anyway, some of the issues boil down to Thane being four. Most of what he was doing is pretty typical for a 4-year-old. A couple of online friends pointed out that I could have probably just explained it as “Thane’s four. He’s just being four.” That actually brings up one interesting thing about Thane. I find it charming, but people don’t get it. He says he is “One, just one” and he will often point to himself to indicate the fact that he is indeed just one boy. But he is four years old . . . and that means absolutely nothing to him. When you think about it, years don’t mean much to kids and when they say how old they are they are just following a script. Thane doesn’t want this particular script, so for now he’ll be one, until he decides he is more than one.

Random This and That

I’m just going to do some random thoughts – definitely not a cohesive blog entry!

Thane walked into the office on Friday night and handed me a camera. I finally got around to stashing them in different rooms again. I asked if he used it, and he said yes . . . but for some reason I didn’t unload it until today. Dave and I got a kick out of what he chooses to take pictures of. This time it was chairs – up-close pictures of the chair fabrics. He took one of my office chair, Dave’s, Braeden’s, the leather recliner, two mismatched kitchen chairs, and finally one of the dining chairs out in the sunroom. Basically he covered every texture of chair on the first floor of the house.

We have had a string of very positive reports on Thane’s progress – reports just came in from his horseback therapy, his old speech therapist and his old occupational therapist. All of them remarked on how hard he works and how much progress he has shown in all areas.

We’re also feeling like we made the right choice to switch schools. I am so impressed with how much thought and care his teachers put into keeping him well and helping him through transitions. He told us yesterday as we drove past his old school that he does like his new one better. The old school was good for who he was last year, but the new school is more appropriate for today’s Thane.

Right now the only negative about Thaney’s behavior is that he is head-butting again and being more physical again. It isn’t aggressive because he is a rather cheerful little man. Instead I think it is sensory. He cried in pain when we got rained on the other day, so I think some sensory stuff is flaring up. I think there are a few things we can do to help. One is to restore access to a swing in the living room. The other is to massage his head. I have been doing a lot of that this weekend and I have been rammed by him since Friday.

Braeden is doing well. He is so easy in a lot of ways, and he is very, very helpful. I made a point of stopping by to watch him at soccer camp a couple of times –without telling him beforehand so it was unexpected. I even did it on a day when someone else was planning to pick him up because I just thought it would be nice to watch. He has been goalie a lot lately and he is thinking he wants to do traveling soccer in fall. I need to check with a friend to see if we might be able to coordinate efforts on that one because our town has a lousy team and it would be better for him to do it elsewhere. One trick will be finding something that doesn’t interfere with fall afterschool sailing or his theater troupe.

Braeden doesn’t have camp this week, but is going adventuring on two or three days with a friend. Next week he does Dutch Soccer, then a week off and he will do sailing with two friends. Then both boys will be off for a bit over a week before school starts again. It’s hard to believe that it is coming in just five weeks now!

In the AC

With the humid air lately, I have found myself much more comfortable hanging out in my office with the air-conditioner going. The computer gets a bit boring, so along with art projects with Thane (stickers, coloring where I have to do all the work until my hand falls asleep, and rubber stamping), I have been beading a little bit.

I got it into my head to make a bracelet for myself. I bought some copper findings because they were so much cheaper than sterling. I made this bracelet with copper and copper crystal, but I can't decide whether it might just be too dainty for a large woman such as myself. I love the color, but I'm debating making myself something a bit clunkier.


I've also been playing with bookmarks a lot, but haven't photographed any of those. The pictures only get taken if the children are doing something fun and one of the pieces happens to be around. I took the picture below of a pen with lampwork, furnace cane, and pewter beads, and a key ring with lampwork and pewter, because I was also taking photos of Thane with stickers all over himself. Good thing they are gluten-free. Dave came in and joked that he will be the one of our boys to get the tattoos.

More Mixed Art

I can't resist posting one of the images that appeared on my desk when I was in the shower today. It's cute! nHe says the dinosaurs are hungry and want to eat plants.

Mixed

Thane came to me and said, “I have a surprise for you . . . it’s mixed!”


You have to check Rainforest Pictures to understand that was a big deal to him! He was quite happy and proud of himself, and I am enjoying my surprise.

More Theater Camp

I frame captured some images from the video camera as I thought Braeden's grandparents would want to see him swordfighting, dancing (third back in middle), and then as Kermit the frog (under the umbrella) who turns into a prince (dark green coat).

Summer Camp

Braeden finished two rounds of theater summer camp last night. He had performances at the end of each one. I have no photos of the first one because I am just plain lousy at getting pictures without a flash in a building that is pretty much black -- black walls, black curtains, black floor, black chairs, etc. So here is just one from last night. Braeden is the one farthest to the right. He was in a couple of demonstration pieces and in "Rapunzel Uncut."

Thane's School

I have to say that I am impressed with Thane’s new preschool. Everyone there is very friendly and it seems like everyone knows who all the kids are, whether or not they are directly involved with the child.

We had a really bad pickup on Tuesday, which resulted in my chickening out of the field trip on Wednesday. Wednesday afternoon I spoke with our social worker and she told me a lot about how his school day is going – when I asked her to stop by, I thought she might be there for a half hour but instead she stayed most of the morning.

Thursday morning the teachers were all set to have Thane stay a bit late. When I arrived, one of the teachers skipped him over to the car and put him inside for me – and then took his swim stuff inside to hang so we didn’t have to bring it back on Friday. It worked so perfectly it was wonderful!

Today I picked him up, and he ran to me, hugged me, and slurred that it was really nice to see me. I offered him some time on the playground before leaving. I watched him play with two little girls. One looked older and seemed very nurturing, while the other was younger and more on the same level with Thane. It was very sweet to see their interactions, to see Thane actually wait his turn without huffing, and that he was intentionally being social without having to control everyone around him.

We had a discussion on the playground about a rocket sand mold that he wanted to take with him, but he agreed to leave it. There was discussion, but no hysterics.

He got in the car easily and fell asleep quickly. He was pleasant when we got home too, so all very successful.

He also made it through part of Braeden’s performance on Thursday evening, but not through it all. And once again, my video camera didn’t make it either, so Dave didn’t get to see the play at the end. It was a bit too long for a four-year-old, and some kind of spooky lighting . . . but the hardest part was the clapping and the noise. Thaney got pretty nervous. He was only happy when Braeden was on stage, and only when he could see me. He wasn’t being particularly accepting of Kim, when he usually is, so Dave took him outside once he announced he had to pee. Considering how many challenges the little guy has faced back-to-back this week, I can’t help but be in awe of his strength.

Long Night, Long Day

I had my version of a panic attack last night around midnight. I was trying to go to sleep and completely stressing out about today. Thane was going on his first ever school field trip. I agreed to drive because I noticed there weren’t many minivans . . . but I did say that I didn’t want to participate once there because I thought I might hinder Thane’s enjoyment of the trip or cause him to act up. After yesterday’s pick up, I really felt like the trip was doomed to be a failure if I showed my face for any part of it.

Dave stepped in and went in my place. It was nice of him, and the guys had a good time. He gets an extra bonus for taking a camera and getting a couple of pictures for me.


Dave was more pro-active about issues relating to Thane’s school than usual today – he spoke with a few of the teachers and one-on-ones about how stressed I was feeling about the physical fight Thane is giving when it is time to leave. While I wasn’t sleeping, I figured out that part of the issue might simply be that he was used to being outside playing at pick-up time . . . it would explain why he is initially happy to see me and then turns mean. So we may work something out where he stays a little extra time on the playground and then I take him home.

Our social worker came today and I spoke with her about it. I had asked her to pop in and see how he was doing because he won’t let me. She has been working with us for two years now, so I am comfortable with her and her feedback. She actually stayed most of the school day (morning) observing. She told me where he was having troubles, what the teachers were working on, and really that considering it has only been two weeks he is doing very, very well.

She also agreed that he is probably letting loose on me because he is working so hard during the day and it is a lot of effort – and mama is safety. I don’t know why it has been hurting my feelings this week, but it has. Maybe because I’m sick and the stuff I am taking is giving me a constant headache. He was absolutely beautiful for horseback riding this afternoon – he even climbed the mounting blocks by himself. Then he led his team around the riding area looking for puzzle pieces to complete a puzzle. We got his report from the first session and he got a wonderful write-up because of his steady improvement and growing acceptance of taking direction. He is very cute while he waits because I reminded him he needed to be patient, but he was really struggling with the wait. It amazes me how hard he pushes himself beyond his comfort zone. I think that inner strength will serve him very well!

Faces

I can't resist posting these because I find them pretty funny . . . monkey see, monkey do, monkey wants to be like big brother too!







The other day Thane climbed into Braeden's desk chair with him and said, "Braeden, you're my best friend!"

Fourth of July

We had a pretty quiet 4th of July. We had a lunchtime cookout on the back deck, went over to the pool for an afternoon swim, went and got ice cream at around 8 p.m., and then took in the fireworks in Thomaston.

The fireworks were kind of slow and dull, but also too much for Thane. Again, I admire his ability to really try through some very difficult experiences. He was okay for about 10 minutes as long as he was in the car with the windows done up so it wasn’t so loud. I remember years ago that we went to fireworks in Eastport – so 30+ years ago – and they were set to music so you could have your radio going and it was “choreographed”. That kind of event would probably be easier for Thane to take.

Here are some pictures from our day:

Braeden, age 10.

What does this pickled pepper look like to you?

“I first! You can’t catch me!”

“Wanna bet?”

The boys swimming together.

The swingset as seen from the pool deck.

The joy of shoving big brother down the slide.

Braeden being his graceful self.

Thane tries to show how it is done.

I got surprisingly lucky with a family photo.

I got a second chance before Thane was through.

Thane says the polar bear is drinking apple juice.

Head first!

A nice smile!

Taking a break to line things up.

Another nice smile.

New School + Educating Myself

I’m doing a Sunday afternoon blog catch-up.

Thane started a new school this week. The first day was hard. It was a rule that he wear short sleeves and shorts because we didn’t want him overheating (he won’t drink water). Then we turned the “wrong way” taking the “wrong path” to get to the new school. He was in full-blown tears outside and I felt horrible. We slowly got him closer, but the mosquitoes were out and they were bothering him too (he is not a fan of bugs). Once inside the activities interested him, and seeing the teacher who played with him the other day helped, but he still said good-bye reluctantly with a red-and-white, blotchy, tear-stained face and completely downturned mouth.

I think that is the hardest time I have had leaving a child at school so far! Braeden was ready and didn’t cry when we left. With Thane’s last school, he started out in the toddler program and I stayed with him, or at least in the building (there was a parent support group down the hall once a week), and that lasted for nine months. That gave me time to get comfortable with the staff, and to keep an eye out on Thane.

The good news is that he continues to meet challenges with a ton of strength. I have to say I totally admire his persistence and willingness to push against things that are uncomfortable to him. He really tries to work through any issues he has, and he simply doesn’t give up easily on much of anything (unless it involves eating or holding a pen/pencil/crayon/marker!). He was only a little reluctant to go on his second day, and didn’t want to leave without a ride down the slide since the extended day children play outside after lunch. Wednesday and Thursday were easy drop-offs, and he was doing better each day with the day’s activities. I didn’t think he would need a lot of extra support for long, but I think it has helped him get over this big change.

I’ve been impressed with how careful everyone is being to make sure he stays healthy. We had something go wrong on Monday, but it still isn’t 100% clear. He was offered Kinnikick’s Kinni-Critters for snack. He wasn’t seen eating one, but he did spend about two hours running in and out of the bathroom, and not always making it. I asked him if his tummy was sick and he said, “No. Tummy not sick. It hurts!” Poor guy!

Looking around, I saw shared lines with eggs and palm fruit as an ingredient – and I really didn’t know what a palm fruit was, though I have seen palm oil in a lot of things. I learned today that palm fruits are the same as dates. I asked on some gluten-free and biomed lists, but mostly the suggestion was that the soy in the cookies could be the issue. We have other things with soy, though not a lot, so I don’t think that is it. Today I have been searching for some new foods to try so I have been going back and forth between web sites checking on traces of this and that. If there are eggs or gluten on a shared line, that’s a no go. But I would think shared facility different room on eggs would be OK, so I have been double-checking everything. Apparently they have to say “may contain traces” if they are in the same building! Ugh. I actually feel some sense of relief in finding out what may have caused some of the flare-up. Thankfully it wasn’t a horrible one – he had a hurt tummy, but he was still in good spirits and active.

Below is a picture of the fruit from a date palm tree – it can be called a date, or a palm fruit depending on the manufacturer.

Moth Eyes

This is me being a bit silly . . . This lunar moth was staring through the screen at us the other night. Kind of cool.